Hell

I don't mean to be offensive in this blog post, but my God hasn't called me to just making people feel better with my words but to speak the truth. Hell is REAL. People assume that if there's a God out there, there's no way that He could possibly let a person go to such an awful place. Yeah well scripture doesn't exactly agree.

²¹ “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. ²² Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ ²³ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’

I'm not saying this to crush people's hopes when it comes to losing family members, friends, etc. But it's simply the truth. Being a "good person" or "waiting until you get your ducks in a row" to come to know Christ is NOT a good idea and won't mark you as safe. I pray that people wake up and realize that heaven and hell are not just a thought or a fairytale. They're REAL.

20/20 Vision - What Does It Take?

I hate going to see the eye doctor. I have terrible vision without my contacts or glasses. What normal people with perfect vision see on a chalkboard at a distance of 300 ft away, I see at 10 ft. Everytime I have an eye appointment and they make me try to read the giant "M" (because the big "E" is too small for me to see even when I squint so they pull out the 8x10 letters for me!) without my contacts, I just feel like a huge failure. I know that it's an "M" on the wall because I've been so many times, but I can't cheat. Like I said, I just hate trips to the eye doctor.

Yesterday I had an appointment and God used my uncomfortable situation that I usually hate to speak to me. Lately my eyes have been getting so tired by about halfway through the day. For some reason, when my eyes get tired, they begin to ache very badly. My eyesight had seemed to have gotten worse, also. I was having to squint alot when I was trying to read the letters on the wall (with my contacts in). I especially had trouble when she had me cover one eye, and then the other while reading. It was so frustrating how bad my eyes were, and even more so when they were used separately. I was feeling a little discouraged.

Dr. Kramer then told me some news I had never gotten before. "Has anyone ever tested you for astigmatism before? Because you're showing a step 4 astigmatism and we usually treat anyone with a step 3 or worse."

 I was so excited! She figured out why I was having such pain and trouble seeing with my eyes lately! All it took to correct the problem were a fancy new prescription of contacts. I now can distinguish between P's and F's without squinting!

God gave me a revelation while I was in the middle of picking out a new pair of glasses in the waiting room after I had my awesome, amazing new contacts in. My eyes are a team. Without my right eye, my left eye can barely read any of the letters on the wall and vice versa. That's even WITH my contacts. God has called me to be Matthew Ryan Miller's bride for this temporary life. Without him, I'm not as strong in furthering God's kingdom because in His good and perfect will, we are to be together. We are to let God use our marriage for His glory in whatever way He will. Together, we are stronger than apart, but there's still something missing. We still will experience pain and trials and tiredness. We can't focus clearly on what steps we should take. If we are only relying on our love and self help books, it's the same as trying to see as well with plain contacts when you have an astigmatism. We need God to act as our fancy new contacts and correct everything. We need him in our lives and relationship. We need his word and time with Him desperately. We need to find our confidence and strength through Him. We need to let Him see all that there is to see in front of us and then guide us where we need to go. Without Him we are weary and weak.

I'm so thankful that God has revealed Himself to me in this way. I pray that He will be all over us in our relationship and that we will seek after him daily. Please pray for us that we will continue to surrender to allow God to move and correct in our lives in all the ways He wants to.

Go HARD

Lately, this has been my FAVORITE song. It inspires and excites me so much! Lecrae's passion for God is infectious and no matter how many times I listen to it, I get goosebumps every time. I'm going to quote someone who commented on this video and then leave the lyrics below. Please take the time to really listen to what he's saying.

"Rappers like T.I. and others will occasionally make songs which seem to have a good message and powerful meaning to them, but when it comes down to it, his (their) songs only teach you to make yourself into God and to glorify your own self.

For someone to take that same power of rap and to devote it to the Gospel is really unique and has ultimate meaning and power to it. The secular rappers only teach you to hope in man, which is utterly vain and foolish. Only The Lord makes Peace."

Verse 1:
(Lecrae)
Lord kill me If I don't preach the gospel
I'm still in my 20's- but I'll die if I got to
Already dead- so forget my flesh
I done been crossed over see the full court press
I'm a full court mess if the Lord don't use me
Running from my trials thinkin everythangs groovy
If the Cross don't move me then I don't wanna breath no mo
If I aint seeing Christ potna I dont wanna see no mo
Rep every day withouth worrying about bruising
I been to china mayne I seen some real persecution
If U didn't know em would ya life look the same
Can they tell you value Jesus by the way you rep his name?
man what's the point of living if Im living for myself
Lord empty out my life before I put you on the shelf

So for God I got Hard I dont' wanna die tonight

It's too many people living who aint heard about my Christ
Go Hard or Go Home(2xs)
Lord Use Me Up(2xs)

Verse 2:
(Lecrae)
Went to Asia had to duck and hide-for Sharin my faith
They tell me water it downwhen I get back to states
They say tone the music down you might sell a lot a records
But it's people out here dying and none of em heard the message
Took my wifey on mission trip - central america
Shared her testimony 40 people stood and stared at her
When she said Jesus shoulda seen it was insane cause 40 out of 40 never heard of Jesus name/ Aw mayne we aint focused on the war we just kickin it/ worried bout our image and our space up on the internet// take me out the game coach/ I don't wanna play no mo/ If cant give it all I got and leave it out there on the court/ Thank you for the Grace for the will and the desire/ got me living for your glory stead of living to retire/ But I pray I'll never tire of Going hard for Messiah/I don't need no motivation You the reason I'm inspired.

Verse 3:
(Tedashii)
Go Hard/Go Home, Go Hard/ Go Home/
That's what that is baby/that what that mean/that what that mean/
That what That is baby/That what that mean/that what that mean/
Wha-What that mean?/That mean that we, should be out up in the streets/
Not just in houses with our bible's summrizing what we read/
Man this aint deep (man this aint deep)/why we aint doing what we read/Its like we sleep (its like we sleep)/
But sinners sleepwalk when they sleep/
So why can't we (so why can't we)/the redeemed of the LORD/
Act out, what He said/and make a scene for the LORD/
Action-cut, say what, like we was the director/
But you better get a Grip like movie sets, and get to stepping/

(Martin)
I know you done it/da-done it, da-done-and heard it all
You was going hard for the Lord before you heard this song/
But don't play yourself to save ya self/and walk in fear/
Scripture's like a mirror/the truth is closer than it appears

...again with the goosebumps. Have a great week!

Word of the Week..

FAMILY

This week my Grandma Nita went to be with the Lord. The past 3 weeks have been so busy with frequent trips to the hospital/nursing home. My dad's side of the family is so big. My grandparents had 4 children, 16 grandchildren (counting spouses), 10 great grandchildren, and LOTS of extra extended family. We found ourselves squeezing into the cramped hallways and in Grandma's bedroom of the nursing home. Everyone was there, crying together, telling stories, laughing, sitting, and loving on Grandma. We all were able to tell her how much she meant to us and what an impact she had on our lives before she passed away. We were able to tell her how much we loved her and that it was okay for her to go home, where she belongs. She ended up passing away on Tuesday morning (3/29). Although it was difficult for us to let her go, we knew that's what would be the absolute best for her. Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday & Friday we all gathered in Grandma's little house and fellowshipped. I just closed my eyes and listened to the sound of ALL of those people laughing and loving each other. I could just hear my Grandpa's big belly laugh in the background of it all and I could picture my Grandma's sheepish smile. God had used them in such a mighty way.. They gave birth to a FAMILY. A family that LOVES no matter what. A family that PULLS TOGETHER in hard times. I can't express how thankful I am for that wonderful family that has given me too many memories to mention..

This weekend, Matt's parents came to Jonesboro all the way from Atlanta! Saturday night my parents and I went out to eat with them and then took them to see mine & Matthew's house in Paragould! Today they came over and we spent the afternoon together in Doniphan. Then this evening was our wedding shower at the church! Afterwards, we all stayed for the church service and Matt lead my church in worship for one song. Let me just begin by saying I'm SO thankful for the amazing FAMILY I'm marrying into. They're so loving and I feel like I've known them my whole life. It's so important to get along with your in-laws and I've just really been blessed in the in-law department (including my future big brother-in-law!).

There were SO many people that came to our wedding shower! I was so overwhelmed by the love that I felt from my church FAMILY. We received so many heartfelt messages and little notes in cards that meant the world to us, sooo many generous gifts, and even a few very sweet handmade gifts. It all meant the world to me. But what meant the most were all of the hugs, tear filled eyes, and words of encouragement that we were met with after the shower was over. I truly do LOVE the people of First Church, Doniphan. They'll always be my family.

Throughout this past week when I was surrounded by loved ones at the funeral, Grandma's house, the church, or even our own home, I just couldn't get over the staggering realization. FAMILY and COMMUNITY are so important in life. Life is about relationships. So, cherish, foster, love, appreciate, and work on the relationships in your life. They're SO important (One in particular, and a life long relationship with Him is definitely worth the effort). My heart is overflowing with the love I've experienced this last week.. with my family. ♥